thirty thoughts
Hello! I'm approaching my thirtieth year of life this coming December & lately, i've been feeling increasingly nostalgic.
Since I've learned a few things in my brief time on earth & I wanted to take this opportunity to reflect // share them with you all.
1. We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are. Anais Nin said this & as I've gotten older I realized how beautifully true it's been for me. A positive mindset will create a positively beautiful outlook on life.
2. Friendships don't always last forever. and that's okay. There's nothing wrong with you. People naturally grow apart. "If they wanted to keep in touch, they would".
3. Don't listen for a second to your 9th grade biology professor that "Science just isn't your thing." You're going to eventually quit your job as a flight attendant at 26 & graduate from UC Berkeley with a degree in Data Science three years later.
4. You like to work hard but you tend to burn out harder. You need to try hard to find balance in life when working hard just for the sake of it, and playing hard because your anxiety is overwhelming you and you want to hide from the world.
5. Humans are amazing. Just because someone else seems smarter, kinder, better looking or more creative, doesn't mean that you aren't. Learn to appreciate people without comparing them to yourself. Draw confidence in who you are & don't worry about what you aren't.
6. Public speaking will probably always be scary to you. But always remember that your audience is likely wishing the best for you, instead of the worst. They also probably don't care as much as you think they do.
7. Sleep more. Scroll less.
8. You hate conflict more than anything, but don't let that be an excuse to let something go. Someone got your order wrong? Don't just say "Thank you" and let it go. Be assertive. This will help you nurture confidence & love yourself more.
9. It's okay not to record or capture every moment in life. Put the camera down, and be in the moment with yourself and those around you. I promise you won't be rewatching the Fourth of July fireworks show from 2012 anytime soon.
10. Sometimes you feel like you're being shunted down a waterslide, an opaque tube that goes on endlessly & you don't know where you'll be spat out. This is a fleeting moment. Nothing ever lasts forever, except family.
11. Family is everything to you. Family is forever.
12. You are a chameleon when it comes to morphing into a version of yourself you think someone will like. It's okay to just be yourself instead. People will actually like that version of you more. And you will too.
13. Ask! for! things! There's a near-zero-percent chance of getting something you never ask for. Ask for the advice. Ask for the correct order. Ask for the promotion.
14. Don't be so stubborn. Practice being the bigger person. Apologize first as often as you can. Look at things from their perspective.
15. Be better with money. Don't spend money so much in your early twenties. Save as much as you can and learn to INVEST. Money is not everything but it will play a detrimental role in the rest of your life.
16. Be honest with people, always. Don't be so wrapped up in caring what others think of you that you aren't honest for fear of them changing their opinion of you.
17. Say "yes" more! "Yes" to your friend who wants to catch up. "Yes" to that running club you've been thinking about joining but haven't gotten around to. "Yes" to as many new experiences as possible. No matter how scary they might seem sometimes.
18. Before making a big decision, ask yourself "is this really what I want?". You can be so easily influenced by others (not to mention, naive) and doing what you think you should do rather than what you want to do. This will take tons of practice to break the habit. But you'll be so much happier for it.
19. You love deeply and often, unconditionally. You are quick to forgive. Never lose this quality about you. You'll need it at important times in your life to keep friendships & relationships that are important to you.
20. Your empathy is a superpower - not a weakness. So is your kindness.
21. Don't dye your hair so much! Embrace your natural color for a few years - your older self will thank you <3
22. Keep people close who genuinely believe in you. On those days when you're doubting yourself, you can remember that these people in your life - the ones who know you best - believe in you completely. There's so much strength in knowing that your inner circle has faith in you, even when you don't.
23. Don't sleep on math. It will actually became extremeley important to you in the future.
24. Don't ever be mean to anybody. & always remember that everyone you meet is going through their own struggle
25. You have so many flaws and will make tons of mistakes. Don't let that be an excuse to binge-watch Netflix all weekend walling in self-pity. It's actually a bit full of yourself to think you are more "inherently flawed" than others. Everyone's flawed. That's kind of what makes us beautiful sometimes.
26. Heartache doesn't last forever. It's all consuming when you're in the midst of it. But, it always passes and you're always okay on the other side.
27. You're an exceptional listener. People sometimes tell you that you should've been a therapist. But don't let this be an excuse never to voice your opinions or thoughts. If someone's talking over you, point it out. You deserve to be heard, too.
28. A good cry will always make you feel better. Whether it's a good cry, or a bad cry. Crying is healthy and you'll do it often.
29. No one owes you anything. Having that mindset just makes you seem entitled and won't get you anywhere.
30. You can learn something from everyone you meet. Each person you encounter, possess knowledge you don't have and excel at things you haven't mastered. Take time to notice their strengths, value their perspectives, and absorb what they can teach you. Keep an attitude of endless curiosity in all aspects of life.
♡, Ashley